Being Alone

Brian and I just finished watching "Everyone's Fine". I dont think I have ever cried that much during a movie, ever. Tears are still streaming down my cheeks from my very puffy eyes. The sight of that man eating, doing yard work, and sleeping alone while longing for company from his children really hit me hard. My heart ached for him, especially when they all declined his invitation to come home for a simple weekend.

I think one of my biggest fears is being alone. I dont want to grow old without Brian or my children nearby. I'm afraid that I will be that old woman who cooks for herself, shops and wakes up alone day in and day out. I've also thought that maybe nobody will visit me even after I'm gone. I know that that was my grandmother's fear too...oh how she was wrong. I hope I am too. Brian promised that if I were to go before him he will come visit me and talk to me, and bring mountain dew with him in memory of me. What a sweetie :)

Sorry for the sad and dreary post. I just had to get it out of me..now I gotta go wash my face.

Have a fabulous weekend, everybody.

Love,
Me